Monday, August 11, 2003


Courtesy of The Onion:
CAPE MAY, NJ�Steven Woods, a claims adjuster with Midland Insurance and coach of the Midland Maniacs fantasy basketball team, announced Monday that he is "deeply saddened" by the sexual-assault allegations leveled against his team's star guard, Kobe Bryant.

"I can't believe this is the same Kobe I've worked with all these years," Woods said at a breakroom press conference. "I've won two Midland Fantasy Basketball League championships with him. He's always handled himself with such class, both on and off the court."

"Obviously, Kobe has my full support during this difficult time," Woods added.
My recent vacation was in Vail, Colorado. Last Wednesday, our group stopped by Eagle to check out the media circus at the courthouse. The entire block across from the courthouse was packed with satellite vans and anchor standup platforms. You can bet that there are actually fantasy basketball players who share the feelings of the fictional "Steven Woods."

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